dog people
simple people doing simple things living simple lives. i can't help but be jealous of everyone i perceive to have an uncomplicated existence compared to mine. of course you can argue "all people are complex in their own ways" but experience overlap only goes so far before it starts getting old. reading things my peers have poured their heart into doesn't elicit much in me when i know their words can only extend them so far. proving how "intelligent" they are by laying things out in a way they deem aesthetic with no deeper meaning. big words won't change the big hole in your heart - your identity is a farce and everyone knows it, yet nobody will say anything because that's all anyone does online: pretend to be something they aren't. in the end you're just like everyone else. no matter what you say or what you do. you can't create something from nothing, and that "nothing" in you is a bit too prominent to ever be something more. someday you'll move on from this, though. the passing fad will fade into the background and you'll continue on with your life. you've been blessed with the opportunity to click the off button on your phone the minute you tire of your game of pretend. no need to feel bad for it, i'm sure the comfortability of moving on from your live action roleplay experience is quite sweet. you could argue my existence like this is sad the same way i could argue this is the stupidest way of living imaginable. but hey, people will be selfish, right? i'm right to be bitter the same way their privilege has given them the right to lie about their experiences to exaggerate their self worth. it's a bit aggravating, though. and i can't stand those people. as nice as i can be to your face it won't change the differences between us and how we will never be able to connect due to it. but we can connect over lying, isn't that enough? hold me like you mean it knowing you're better than me and i'll take whatever i can get like the street dog you set a bowl out for after your 3 course meal. even if you stuffed your fat face full moments prior and the scraps you've left me are cold and bare it makes me feel loved, almost included. i want to be a part of your world, even though it wasn't made for someone like me. i'll make you feel like you're repenting for something. aren't i owed it after everything? so won't you let me in?